When it comes to our children, there’s just not much that moms won’t go through. My daughter asked me hypothetically a while back if I would “be willing” to give her a kidney if she ever needed one. Without hesitation, I said, “I’d give you both of them.” If something happened to my child and I could have prevented it, how would I even go on? And no, I don’t have a death wish. It’s just the nature of motherhood and it’s almost every mom I’ve ever known. A 51-year-old woman had her motherly convictions put to the test and as you’d expect, stepped up to deliver. Literally.
Recently we completed a labor and delivery tour at one of our local hospitals! The nurses were sooo nice and super excited for us! It really made us feel good. I was in a puddle of tears (imagine that) with my OBGYN a few months back because with the virus situation, I didn’t think my husband would be able to come to the hospital for the birth. Typically for births only one support person is allowed, but since surrogacy is a unique situation, we both will be able to be in for the delivery! This was such a huge relief..
If Breanna had to pay for a surrogate, it would be expensive, and most gestational carriers received more than $100,000. That’s a lot of money, but if a couple can’t have a child of their own and can afford it, most will happily pay up. The thing is, Julia offered as soon as she learned that Breanna was having trouble getting pregnant, but Breanna refused her mother’s offer. “I knew she wanted to be helpful, but I just kept kind of saying no,” Lockwood said. However, the topic came up again at a doctor’s appointment when Breanna took Julia along.
One thing a lot of people have mentioned to me is a baby girl develops all her eggs for her lifetime during gestation. So when my mom carried me 29 years ago, she also carried her grandchild then too! She’s carried her twice!
The doctor, Dr. Kaplan, was surprised. “Normally a gestational carrier should be under 40 years, but in medicine, you have to look at an individual and personalize it,” he said.
He discussed the possibility with his colleagues and they agreed to go through with it providing Julia could “go through all these hoops to make sure she was as healthy as possible [and] as educated as possible about the risks involved,” he said. The team took it very seriously and agreed that it was certainly unique, and it was absolutely exceptional and not something they would ordinarily attempt. Finally, Julia was approved as a surrogate for Breanna and her husband.
We read a story a while back about a 60-something mom who carried a baby for her son and his husband. It was a remarkable story and she did it, and even gave birth naturally. That’s a bond that she will always have with the child, who was a girl. We imagine that this mother will feel the same way. It’s the most beautiful sacrifice. Julia is currently 35 weeks pregnant.
Some have a theory that eating pineapple around transfer time can also help with embryo implantation. Seeing ladies rocking socks, pins, shirts, and leggings in the clinic waiting room with pineapples on them was not rare to see. A symbol of hope. A symbol of “hey sis, you’re not alone”.
A pineapple is a perfect symbol of hope in this community. Fighting so hard to become parents our drive is strong. It takes a tough exterior, like a pineapple, to weather all the hormones, appointments, needle sticks, procedures, heartbreak of failed cycles and loss. But through that tough exterior, inside is sweet. The love that we long to give to a child.
“I’m so ready. We’re so lucky and fortunate that this was able to happen for us,” Breanna said.