Words & Phrases Used by Women (JOKE)

WARNING THIS IS NOT FOR PEOPLE EASILY OFFENDED… THIS IS JUST A JOKE!

1) Fine: This is the word she will use to end an argument when she is right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T DO IT!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over ‘nothing’.

(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just
say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true,
unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not
thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’. That will bring on a ‘whatever’).

(8) Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying **** YOU!

(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several
times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to # 3.

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